Where to Go After a Breakup: Three Honest Options

Short answer: after a breakup you have three realistic ways to go somewhere: a structured retreat, a solo trip, or a month living with other people. If your job fits in a laptop, the month is the one we'd pick, and not only because we run one. You keep working, you stop eating alone, and you spend a few weeks with people who never met your ex. A retreat suits you if you want a programme, a solo trip if you want silence. Travel doesn't heal anyone on its own. It does change the kitchen you are sad in, which is sometimes a very good start.

One plain thing before the rest. A stay is not treatment, and we are cooks, not clinicians. If you are struggling to get through the day, or having thoughts of harming yourself, please talk to a doctor or therapist, or find a free, confidential helpline in your country at Find A Helpline.

Why a coliving is writing about this

We have a welcome call with everyone who wants to join a Casa Basilico chapter. Around 70% of the people who join us are going through some kind of life transition, and for a lot of them that transition is a breakup.

So this question reaches us a lot, usually phrased as something else. "Is the group nice?" "Will I be the only one on my own?" Here's the answer we'd give a friend.

Casa Basilico is a pop-up foodie coliving for remote workers. We fill a house with people who work from a laptop, and we cook and eat together. Right now you can join us at Banana House in Madeira, open all year from €997 a month, or in Pipa, Brazil, in two bookable months between 15 January and 15 March 2027.

Option one: a breakup retreat

A retreat gives you a short, structured programme with facilitators and other people in the same boat. Someone else has decided what happens at 9am, which can be a huge relief when deciding what to have for lunch feels like a board meeting.

It suits you if you want tools and guidance, you can afford a higher price for a few days, and you like the idea of talking about the relationship on purpose.

It may not suit you if you are tired of talking about it, or you need more than four days away. We compared the formats and real prices in our guide to breakup retreats and their alternatives.

Option two: a solo trip

A solo trip gives you silence, control and nobody asking how you are holding up. You pick the place, the pace and the number of times you cry on a train.

It suits you if you have people at home to call, you enjoy your own company on a normal day, and you want to prove to yourself that you can do this alone.

It may not suit you if the evenings are already the hard part. A hotel room can be a very scenic version of the flat you just left. We wrote a separate guide to solo travel after a breakup, including how to go alone without spending the whole trip alone.

Option three: a month living with other people (our pick)

This is the one we know from the inside. You move into a shared house for a few weeks, keep working, and have people around at the end of the day without having to organise any of it. Nobody runs a session on your feelings. Someone just asks if you can chop an onion.

It suits you if your work fits in a laptop, you want routine more than revelation, and you would like some company that has never met your ex.

This is the option we'd pick for most people who can work remotely. A retreat ends after four days, and a solo trip can end every evening at a table for one. A month in a shared house gives you a routine and people around you at 8pm, week after week. At Banana House the seven rooms keep the group small, and every room has a real desk.

It may not suit you if you need clinical support right now. Start there, and come when you're ready.

If you stay somewhere for work and life at once, the question gets more practical. Our list of things to do after a breakup when you work remotely starts with leaving the flat you shared.

The film we made about this

If it was a divorce

Divorce adds admin to the heartbreak. There may be lawyers, a shared mortgage, a house to sell and children who need you on Tuesday. Those things pick the dates, and it is worth accepting that before you fall in love with a one-way ticket.

Two weeks away between legal milestones can do more than a grand exit you have to cancel. If money is being divided, check what you can spend before you spend it. And if you share custody, sort the calendar first, then choose the place.

What going away will not fix

You will still miss them. You may miss them more on a beautiful beach, which feels unfair. A new place will not settle what happened, answer the question you keep rehearsing in the shower, or replace support you need from a professional.

What it can change is the context: new surroundings, new people, things to try and time to notice what that shows you. What you do with that is yours. Some of the hardest hours are the quiet ones, so we wrote about being lonely after a breakup as well.

And if you are wondering whether this should turn into something bigger, read about starting over at 30 before you hand in the keys.

Five questions to choose

1. Do I want to talk about it or get a break from talking about it? One points to a retreat, the other doesn't.
2. What happens to me at 8pm? Be honest. This question is worth more than any destination list.
3. Does my job come with me? If yes, you can stay longer than a holiday allows.
4. What can I actually spend? A breakup is an expensive time to discover a new personality that buys business class.
5. Am I safe and coping day to day? If not, the next step is support, and the trip can wait.

If you read all that and still don't know, book a quick call. Tell us what's going on and we'll tell you straight whether a month at Banana House or in Pipa makes sense right now. A pasta invitation is not a treatment plan, but it is a decent Tuesday.

FAQ

Where should I go after a breakup?

Go somewhere that matches what you actually need. Pick a structured retreat if you want guidance, a solo trip if you want quiet and your own pace, or a month in a shared house if your job travels and you would rather not eat alone every night.

How soon after a breakup should I travel?

There is no correct number of weeks. Leave when you can look after yourself on the road and when you are going towards something, even something small. If you cannot manage basic daily life at home, talk to a professional before you book anything.

Will a trip help me get over my ex?

Not on its own. Travel changes your surroundings and your routine, and that can give you some room. The feelings come with you in the hand luggage, and they still need time and sometimes professional support.

Is a divorce trip different from a breakup trip?

Often, yes. Divorce can come with lawyers, shared money, a house to sort out and children to look after. Those commitments decide how long you can leave and when, so start with the calendar they give you.

About the author

Fabio Deriu and Julia “Juls” Zaboklicka are the co-founders of Casa Basilico, a pop-up foodie coliving for digital nomads. They started by cooking for remote workers in Madeira and now host travelling chapters built around work, shared food, and community.